I’m a loser (baby, so why don’t you kill me.) This can not be ignored for even another minute, and it’s my own fault. For some reason I just recently discovered Beck.

Now, of course I knew who Beck was. Like most people my age I know most-to-all of the lyrics to “Loser” even if I don’t particularly care for that song anymore (”drive-by body pierce!”.) Like most people my age that attended college, I heard Odelay! ad nauseum for the entire year of 1996, most of 1997 and even some of 1998. And that’s where the problem lies. I have always known about Beck, I just never took the time to really dig into what he was about and that was an egregious error on my part.

I won’t mince words here: I was–and probably still am to some degree–overly elitist about music. In college, however, this inexplicably meant a shift from my HS days of listening to Pavement and Smashing Pumpkins to anointing bands like Korn, Orange 9MM and Limp Bizkit as the “new guard” (yes, I actually used to use the words “new guard” in casual conversation about these bands on multiple occasions) and actively promoting them to everyone I knew (note: yes, I realize I am now fired from this publication.)

I relate that story to relate this story: during this time, everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, was listening to Beck (and probably turning it up as loud as possible to drown out the drone of my reedy voice), and I was missing out, even though I was too busy complaining to notice much. I often loudly complained about Beck as a one-hit wonder and “fake alternative” artsist at house parties and the like (I mentioned I was insufferable, no?), but all the while I secretly suspected that “Loser” was an anomaly in Beck’s catalog (even though that song has it’s place, too) and that 10 years down the road (or thereabouts) Odelay! would be hailed as an all-time classic (I realize I just said I was too busy complaining to notice, however, I wasn’t so blind to notice that I was pretty much the only one complaining, aside from this dude who complained about pretty much anything that wasn’t Pantera.) Turns out I was right, even though I didn’t want to be. It also turns out I didn’t know I actually wanted to be right, either.

The other night as I was CD shopping (why do my CD buying excursions always inspire some barely enjoyable blog from me?–I’ll have to blog about it.) I stumbled across both Odelay! and Guero right next to each other in a used bin. Initially, I skipped over them both, the Beck-hating has been ingrained for so long it’s just Pavlovian response at this point, but then I started thinking about what a good song “Devil’s Haircut” is and how much I like “Hell Yes” from Guero. I bought them both and then proceeded to kick myself for not owning them sooner. After thinking about why I had really started to hate Beck in the first place, I realized that it was that one of my college neighbors that had really started the ball rolling. She listened to what I considered unforgiveably bad music (Counting Crows, Live, Hootie, etc.) but loved, loved, loved Beck so I immediately hated her (insufferable, remember) and Beck by association. I have made a mistake but there is nothing I can do now but admit it and move on.

Has anyone else done this? Hated a band for reasons that only become fully clear much later? Does anyone still hate Beck for “Loser”? Do you hate me for taking up valuable space and wasting you time?